Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Coming or Going

My current job situation (read: without one) has been a blessing in many ways. I feel like I worked very hard for almost three years in Portland with very little in the way of 'down time', so it has really helped to rest and re-charge my batteries. It has also been great to reconnect with old friends and spend time with my family. Most importantly, I feel that I have recently gained a bit of perspective on things.

It can be hard to quantify, but I feel I have a little bit more clarity, despite my life still being fairly messy. I can't really point to one specific event or thing that helped provide this clarity, but just in the past few days I feel like I've been able to see the finish line a bit more clearly, and that means a lot. I believe I've always been someone with goals, but even those have felt a bit more tangible recently.

For me, what I think it comes down to is realizing that almost everything I do can be tied into the long-term goals I have for myself. Prior to this 'awakening' as such, I had goals but they always seemed a bit detached, maybe more like pipe dreams. But with this realization comes the knowledge that they can indeed be accomplished, and that accomplishing them comes with continued responsibility for my own actions.

It seems a bit silly to be typing this, as I should probably have learned this lesson ages ago, maybe in college. But oh well, better late than never, and I'm just glad I'm starting late as opposed to not starting at all.


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